Playing Hard to Get: 'The Rules' Vs 'The Game' | The Soulmates Blog
Apr 19, Not another cute pseudonym that gives bad dating behavior a pass in ! When I first heard the term "long-gaming," I immediately thought "BS! end up with this person in the future, at least for a bit, "you long-game them,". But even in those situations, playing the long game means creating . Some dating advice suggests that being the first one to express interest puts the control in. Find out if your date is playing the dating game & keeping it cool. to maintain the act of indifference, but the personal questions they ask give them away. seeking a long term relationship had a better success rate when playing hard to get.
The Girls Ultimate Dating Playbook
The uninterested person, if they have agreed to a date will not have a clear idea of when you can meet again in the future.
The hard to get player will take a genuine interest in your life. They will remember things that you have told them and will try to bring up common interests in conversation. The uninterested person will remember very little of what you have told them and will try their best to avoid asking you anything too personal.
Quite often this type of person just needs someone to talk to or to give them advice.
Should we play hard to get? You might have told all your friends that you are done with playing games, and you just want to be honest with the next person you date. Well, perhaps you should hold your horses! A study in The European Journal of Personality presents data collected from a group of young men and women attending four different universities. The results show that those seeking a long term relationship had a better success rate when playing hard to get.
The Girls Ultimate Dating Playbook | Her Campus
If you think about it, this makes absolute sense. Our subconscious is probably telling us that if your prospective partner is willing to put in the hard work, then they are probably in for the long haul.
The problem with going down this path is that in all likelihood your love interest will be pulling the same stunt. You could end up missing out on the love of your life because neither of you was willing to admit your interest in the other. But even in those situations, playing the long game means creating opportunity for a future connection with that person. A couple of years ago, I met Sarah at a party.
It was clear that we had a mutual attraction and we had a lovey time flirting with each other. When we had dinner, we had a lovely evening. Sarah and I had a lot to talk about and we kept things friendly, but not flirtatious or sexual because there was a clear boundary in place.
Either way, it looked like a win to me. At one point, we took the opportunity to talk about that and we both made it clear that the interest was there. That made it much easier to set it aside and have a really good time. Over the next couple of years, we got together every so often.
We moved through some of the same circles, so we always had plenty to talk about and have a fun get-together.
Play The Long Game - Charlie Glickman PhD
Playing the long game means taking the larger view. We were willing to invest a little time into building a friendship that made room for future possibilities. Rather than pushing to make something happen immediately, you can create some space for whatever each person needs. It also shows your willingness to calibrate your relationships to fit everyone involved. It helps you avoid slipping into a shame spiral because you know that things will change.